<!DOCTYPE html>
<html>
<head>
<meta charset="UTF-8">
<title>it's tragic with a capital T by bennybentacles</title>
<style type="text/css">

body { background-color: #ffffff; }
.CI {
text-align:center;
margin-top:0px;
margin-bottom:0px;
padding:0px;
}
.center   {text-align: center;}
.cover    {text-align: center;}
.full     {width: 100%; }
.quarter  {width: 25%; }
.smcap    {font-variant: small-caps;}
.u        {text-decoration: underline;}
.bold     {font-weight: bold;}
</style>
</head>
<body>
<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/26458837">it's tragic with a capital T</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/bennybentacles/pseuds/bennybentacles'>bennybentacles</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Series:</b></td><td>bad things happen bingo [7]</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>The Umbrella Academy (Comics), The Umbrella Academy (TV)</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Food Poisoning, Gen, Homelessness, Implied/Referenced Drug Use, Pre-Canon, Protective Ben Hargreeves, Reginald Hargreeves' A+ Parenting, Swearing, Vomiting, i dont know how to tag so forgive me for that, i guess</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-09-14</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-09-14</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-06 07:33:27</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>General Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>No Archive Warnings Apply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>906</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/26458837</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/bennybentacles/pseuds/bennybentacles</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>a glimpse in the life of our wonderful duo Klaus and Ben as they encounter another problem </p><p> </p><p>//<br/>prompt filled: food poisoning</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Ben Hargreeves &amp; Klaus Hargreeves</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Series:</b></td><td>bad things happen bingo [7]</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Series URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/series/1913851</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>23</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Collections:</b></td><td>Bad Things Happen Bingo</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>it's tragic with a capital T</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>living in the streets is not great, to say the least. but compared to the horror house that he lived all of his life, the streets sounds like a treat. yes, it is damp and cold and smells like rotten eggs but he'd rather die on the streets than to come crawling back to his childhood home</p><p>the thing is, if he has a choice, he wouldn't really live on the streets. but he doesn't. he's penniless, he doesn't have a degree and he doesn't know any basic survival skills because his father didn't think that far ahead. </p><p>" maybe look at dumpsters near restaurants Klaus" Ben suggested one night that they— well, technically just him, were dumpster diving for food because as he said, he's homeless and penniless. "shut your piehole Ben" Klaus hissed out, his eyes glancing in his brother for a second.</p><p>"you won't find anything in this place Klaus. this is next to a hardware. the best thing you can find in there are dead rats" Ben said, totally ignoring what he just hissed out which hey, <em>rude as hell</em>. "maybe i'm trying to look for woods or bolts or whatever the fuck do hardwares throw out" Klaus retorted, just because he's a little shit, and because he likes to see how Ben's face would morph into the annoyed little face that he makes when he is being a little shit. </p><p>"just get the hell of that dumpster because i'm pretty sure you are standing on a rotting rat" is he? yes he is and he can only grimace in disgust as he climbed out of the dumpster. " well where should i look then, if you're the expert on dumpster diving" he drawled out as he started to walk his way out of the alleyway they are in, eyes glancing back to his brother who is walking slowly beside him.</p><p>"well there is a restaurant near here so check that out" Ben, the ever vigilant ghost buddy of his suggested and Klaus can only grin as he wiped his soiled hands on his soiled shirt. " okay. sure- it would be fun though if we just happen to walk past Diego and he invites us to eat waffles. <em>just saying</em>" he mumbled as he slowly made his way to the dumpster that Ben is writing sonnets about.</p><p>"if this doesn't have a fucking food in here im going to strangle you" beside him, Ben only snorted and he can only roll his eyes before he lifted off the lid of the dumpster. "holy shit that alot Klaus" Ben whispered as he peered his ghostly eyes over the piles of food inside the dumpster</p><p>Klaus  didn't pay any mind to his brother before he grabbed the first food that he sees— <em>holy fuck, a waffle?</em> its been too long since he had one— and slowly but surely he ate until he felt like he was going to combust and there are literal tears in his eyes</p><p>...<br/>
good news, he felt full after the meal and he had a good night sleep with his stomach full. bad news is that he thinks those food in the dumpster had been cured with rat poison. </p><p>"i'm going to die" Klaus moaned out as he gripped his stomach tight, his eyes closed as tears slipped by. "holy shit i am going to die" and he can only grit his teeth as he rode another wave of pain that stabbed his stomach</p><p>"i can't believe they do that!" beside him, his brother ranted angrily. he's been doing that for hours now and at first Klaus had tried to listen, but its been four hours now and Ben was only repeating his arguments and <em>his stomach hurts</em> so forgive him for not really tuning in on the ghost channel</p><p>"can't believe that they what, poison the dumpster food? that they don't leave food for homeless junkie whores?" Klaus muttered as he rolled his eyes before he suddenly leaned away from his place and puked. </p><p>"well i hope their business rots in hell" Ben declared before he lost his steam and sat next to his brother, who in return looked at Ben with wide eyes as he let out a shocked laugh.</p><p>"holy shit Ben— go curse that place to the ground with your magic dead powers" Klaus laughed out loud before he curled in on himself once more because his stomach ached again. </p><p>....<br/>
it took three days of nonstop puking, four more days of riding out stomach pains and two more of him just wishing the ground to swallow him whole before he felt remotely better.</p><p>"so what dumpster should we take a swim this time?" Klaus asked ben as he stood up shakily. with a sigh, Ben started telling Klaus his finds when Klaus was busy puking his guts out</p><p>the thing is Klaus knows people would do this shit on homeless people like him. he's seen this way too many times, saw how his friends die because of a laced bread and poisoned water bottles. saw how his friends slowly waste away hidden in the dumpsters that gave them those poisoned goods that they stuffed on their hungry stomach. yet he still chose to stay in the streets and risk dying because somebody decided that they would rather poison their wastes than to give them to homeless rather than go back home with his father because eww no way.</p><p> </p><p> </p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>this is short, i know and for that i apoligize. </p><p> </p><p>title from Kill All Your Friends by My Chemical Romace</p><p>yell at me in tumblr @bennybentacles</p></blockquote></div></div>
</body>
</html>